14.08.20 Pt 2 – Level 2 is on the way, but it comes with a few creases. If we’re going to be out in public, maybe dancing girls in nightclubs have the solution. Is there anything as cold as a whore’s heart? Only methheads don’t answer calls… put the pipe down and pick up the phone! Irony is when a drunkard bans drinking. ‘Sibongile Money’ is not smart enough to be a criminal.

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14.08.20 Pt 1 – Charles was once married to a princess who was liked by people, that was no good… you can get a mug with them on there though. Should people augment their looks, or should they age naturally? There’s a new chief of YouTube, he sings badly, but he’s a chief. Is your cock down because of lockdown?

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A study conducted by global audit firm KPMG in 2014, found that sexual and gender-based violence (SGBV) costs South Africa between R28.4bn and R42.4bn a year. It’s time for corporate South Africa to acknowledge that SGBV is not just a social risk… but a chronic political, market and financial risk that affects multiple industries, sectors and geographies.

Join Gareth Cliff in conversation with Hermien Botes, Head of Sustainability Engagement for Anglo American; Andrew Davies, MD of ICAS, providing health and wellness programmes and counselling services to corporate South Africa; and Nadine Mather from law firm Bowmans, who will look at constructive steps that employers can take to address SGBV in the workplace.

Brought to you by Absa.

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13.08.20 Pt 2 – Brexit has a cousin and this cousin comes with good weather, wine and a mountain. If you have an iPhone you can now determine where your data goes, including which tech giants can crawl up your rear orifice to exploit you. The big money backs the democrats in the USA, is this good news for ‘the home of the brave’?

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13.08.20 Pt 1 – The prayer of the devil exists only in the man who runs when he’s not being chased. Are chakras real, because maybe the seasons affect how you should live your life? Is South Africa against being protected by its protector? Does the President wear slippers while he tells you, you can’t do yoga in a botanical garden? And is Ellen worthy of being a mentor?

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Death by its very nature is always a very messy topic, but somebody has to deal with the practical side… which is the cleaning up, after a traumatic event becomes a crime scene. From bereaved families to gross filth, Marelize and Benjamin van den Berg of Crime Scene Cleanup take care of the most horrific scenes, in order to make them habitable for human beings in future. Not all heroes wear capes, some wear hazmat suits.

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12.08.20 Pt 2 – The real pandemic is Cofat-19, waist expansion – coming to beaches near you soon. Kamala Harris is the running mate nomination for Joe Biden and is in the hot seat right away. Shock horror… some people are actually just nice people. The US Presidential race might need to take place in an old age home. If you’re going to commit suicide, please use the bathroom.

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12.08.20 Pt 1 – Do you bath or shower in the mornings, and what does that say about you? Is it a nightmare to turn on a manual geyser? Corruption is alright, until you’re gatvol. Is patriotism useful? If you want the Covid cure to work, squish the lemon, don’t seep it. Is being the American President a drive-by shooting gig? Which politicians would you like to see in a UFC cage?

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11.08.20 Pt 2 – If you keep secrets, does it matter to you who gets hurt? Is there such a thing as the ‘bro code’? Julius Malema seems to think Vaseline is important for the relationship citizens share with the ruling party. Calling some people ”emotionally wonky” is tough, but fair.

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11.08.20 Pt 1 – The old and the restless met up for a secret party this past weekend, just be careful of those thirsty gold diggers… they’ll bring down an empire. If you are in a relationship, do you need two cellphones to prevent being caught? The Nkandla tuckshop is not for the masses – just for a single wife. And RIP Bob Mabena, the king of funky.

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