28.05.20 Pt 1 - Is it reasonable for people to have rules for guests in the house? Is Bloemfontein actually the Frozen Tundra? What's all the hype about Michael Jordan's documentary? Madonna is apparently obsessed with size. Donald Trump hates Twitter, and he told us this on Twitter.

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27.05.20 Pt 2 - Cows are domesticated by humans sucking their nipples apparently. Damon reveals himself as the worst tea maker on the planet, and also tells a disturbing tale about growths on his back. If you moisturise, how do you dry out... have you heard of starfishing on a towel? Mark Mdluli is not just a comedian, but also a musician, and you can find his latest track on Bandcamp.

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27.05.20 Pt 1 - Is this possibly Damon's last show ever? Gym is a place of spiritual sanctity for some... when are those opening? The Kalavari home has had to swap roles and it's been interesting. What type of lockdown human being are you? Level 5 - awesome haircut length, not so much as a lockdown measure.

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26.05.20 Pt 2 - Is not wearing underwear a serious social faux pas? If you want to be ready for the next pandemic, start planting seeds now that you can eat. A 113-year-old woman in Spain will inspire you with her will to live. Garlic is not only good for you, but vampires hate it... so get some for winter. TopCo CEO Ralf Fletcher then joins us to detail how businesses can become proactive instead of being reactive in the post Covid-19 economy.

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26.05.20 Pt 1 - Do clocks really matter in a global pandemic? Time has warped, how are we feeling about this? How many coronavirus roadblocks are there on the journey from Johannesburg to Durban? Shop local people, they need you! If you don't clean your mess, Phumi will judge you.

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25.05.20 Pt 2 - Hydroxychloroquine is Trump's thing, let him live a little. His golf game is also getting some work, which is fair because of stress. If you love booze, bury your stash in the yard so the family doesn't get any... but be careful - Karens are everywhere! In animal news, it turns out dolphins are romantics and alligators are a pet fit for Hitler. Alan Todd, Director of Research at All Told, breaks down the behavioural patterns of economically active South Africans during lockdown.

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25.05.20 Pt 1 - As of 1 June 2020, you are allowed to drink in South Africa... how much booze will you put into your body on that day? If you dry your underwear in a work colleague's office, should they get to shank you? Earthquakes should never end an interview. What's the worst pick-up line you've ever heard? Whatever it is, Siya topped it. Cringeworthy stuff!

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22.05.20 Pt 2 - The trolley test truly does tell you if you are a good person or not, whether on a train track or at your local shops. Is Beyonce an icon? Nurses in bikinis in Russia are some solace for patients. Jack Lotter, the health and fitness guru, joins us to discuss the South African fitness landscape... and he's clear on how to avoid scammers.

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22.05.20 Pt 1 - Noah seems to have figured out how to keep the peace with his wife during his flood enforced lockdown, what is your problem? Chinese police ooo stations in South Africa are not real are they? If you are beautiful, delete your Twitter account. And check your sanitiser, it might be meth.

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How are you doing in this madness? ‘Vasbyt', as the Afrikaans people say... I write one of these blogs every week and normally they’re not as controversial as the last two, but they might interest you if you’re thinking about what happens next. Just like any other mammal, I don’t have any special powers to predict the future, but I think it’s becoming clear that the lockdown will have far-reaching ramifications. The Coronavirus pandemic has swept across the planet, leading to global chaos and extraordinary changes to all our lives. We’re all spending almost all our time at home and consuming media very differently. There are many confusing messages, and not many sources you can completely trust...

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